Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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