Whoa Z and x make the same sound
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
