i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize