I don't usually arrange sex via text message
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Randomize
