I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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