I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
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