I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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