Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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