How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
