Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
