i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Randomize
