I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
