everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
