I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
