you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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