This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Randomize
