My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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