I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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