Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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