yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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