Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(443): View more from Maryland

i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list

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(251): View more from Alabama

if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?

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(970): View more from Colorado

I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.

(1-970): View more from Colorado

People still let you watch their kids?

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(704): View more from North Carolina

see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it

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(313): View more from Michigan

so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?

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(740): View more from Ohio

we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke

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(719): View more from Colorado

I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on

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(812): View more from Indiana

the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...

(914): View more from New York

Who is this......

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