Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
