Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
