we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
