well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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