You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
two words: eviction party
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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