I wannas sexs uuuuu
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Randomize
