I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
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