So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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