It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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