Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
We are two peas in an std pod
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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