So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
i drank out of a bidet.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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