I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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