Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize