I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
