do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
