what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Randomize
