well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Randomize
