Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
