I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
