it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
