My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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