That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I love having hate sex.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize