Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
