I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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