somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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