Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
