how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
