How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Randomize
