im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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