tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize