the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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